Here is the letter I said I was going to write to the Govenor concerning bathroom safty:
You’re Governorship,
I would like to thank you for taking the time and reading my letter concerning a matter which has been, up until now, largely ignored. It is a subject matter that every man is a victim of and one which has caused much discomfort, unease, and unnecessary stress. I am of course talking about bathroom etiquette.
As I am sure you are well aware, proper bathroom etiquette dictates that at no time should any man occupy a urinal that is immediately occupied by someone else either to the right or to the left of his urinal of choice. As I am also sure you are very much well aware is that the most common configuration of urinals in any place of business is the three urinal system where two full sized urinals exists one right next to the other and then a “kiddy” stall on the end usually placed in the left most position.
Bathroom etiquette mixed with this configuration of urinals along with the fact that it is male tendency to always use the center stall (a.k.a. The Kings Thrown, Urinal of Honor or, if you are Canadian, The Post Molson Brewery) creates a stressful and health threatening situations where some unlucky male who has to use the urinals rather urgently could find that the center urinal is occupied leaving him no other urinal to relive himself.
My proposal is that a law be passed where by all public buildings and business buildings be required to have bathrooms here no fewer than four urinals be present. In this scenario not only will most if not all cases of urgent bathroom use be satisfied, but also, the “Kings Thrown” scenario will also be eliminated ensuring that an available urinal will be present for any additional occupants of the bathroom when it is needed.
I would like to thank you once again for taking the time to read my letter and I look forward to your response. With your help we can make men’s bathrooms across the state a safer, healthier place that all men can once again enjoy. This, along with another proposal that I will discuss in a future letter – the outlawing of “hands free relief” style of urinating, an unacceptable style of bathroom showboating – we can, together, increase bathroom sanitation as well.
Again, thank you and Godspeed
You’re Governorship,
I would like to thank you for taking the time and reading my letter concerning a matter which has been, up until now, largely ignored. It is a subject matter that every man is a victim of and one which has caused much discomfort, unease, and unnecessary stress. I am of course talking about bathroom etiquette.
As I am sure you are well aware, proper bathroom etiquette dictates that at no time should any man occupy a urinal that is immediately occupied by someone else either to the right or to the left of his urinal of choice. As I am also sure you are very much well aware is that the most common configuration of urinals in any place of business is the three urinal system where two full sized urinals exists one right next to the other and then a “kiddy” stall on the end usually placed in the left most position.
Bathroom etiquette mixed with this configuration of urinals along with the fact that it is male tendency to always use the center stall (a.k.a. The Kings Thrown, Urinal of Honor or, if you are Canadian, The Post Molson Brewery) creates a stressful and health threatening situations where some unlucky male who has to use the urinals rather urgently could find that the center urinal is occupied leaving him no other urinal to relive himself.
My proposal is that a law be passed where by all public buildings and business buildings be required to have bathrooms here no fewer than four urinals be present. In this scenario not only will most if not all cases of urgent bathroom use be satisfied, but also, the “Kings Thrown” scenario will also be eliminated ensuring that an available urinal will be present for any additional occupants of the bathroom when it is needed.
I would like to thank you once again for taking the time to read my letter and I look forward to your response. With your help we can make men’s bathrooms across the state a safer, healthier place that all men can once again enjoy. This, along with another proposal that I will discuss in a future letter – the outlawing of “hands free relief” style of urinating, an unacceptable style of bathroom showboating – we can, together, increase bathroom sanitation as well.
Again, thank you and Godspeed
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